tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5223027726680052006.post3144155102835566411..comments2023-07-15T00:49:06.852-07:00Comments on asexy beast: Stormy WeatherIlyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12795337226989102549noreply@blogger.comBlogger2125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5223027726680052006.post-24607750240043392362011-10-05T15:01:37.314-07:002011-10-05T15:01:37.314-07:00@Jessica: I can relate...musings always welcome h...@Jessica: I can relate...musings always welcome here. About the fantasy thing, I've definitely had fantasies about writing the Great American Novel (or play). Perfectionism can be an issue there. Sometimes I forget that even Nobel-prize winning novels probably had first drafts that their writers thought were crappy. Even great writers get frustrated and want to give up at times. And plenty of successful, published novels--an achievement that seems very beyond me--aren't good at all. So, I try to tell myself all that and ward off my perfectionism, but I'm always wondering if I'm even capable of finishing a book-length piece of writing, let alone writing something truly great. <br /><br />They're tough, big dreams...really tough. Because like you said, they can interfere with your mindfulness and enjoyment of your life as it is. But I find that whenever I try to beat down one of my grandiose dreams, it just pops up again in some other sphere. So, I don't know if I can stop dreaming. I might just have to monitor the dreams to make sure that I'm not getting too perfectionistic because of them.<br /><br />It's true: I don't know how to set realistic goals for myself, because it's not like there's a discrete border between what I can and can't do. But I feel like if I have no big dreams, then I can't make realistic goals either, because the realistic goals feel too pathetic to stand alone.Ilyhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/12795337226989102549noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5223027726680052006.post-71444468949188484652011-10-05T13:55:38.797-07:002011-10-05T13:55:38.797-07:00I found all of the items on the list to be excelle...I found all of the items on the list to be excellent jumping-off points. <br /><br />The "emotional terrorism" one is especially interesting. "Overcoming" obstacles etc. really is a hassle sometimes. I honestly think it's to make everyone else feel better, not myself. Like a social obligation that I think is a crock, really. <br /><br />As for the obsession and the fantasy items, that draws me particularly. I have fantasies of being a writer--but not just a writer, but a published writer, and not just a published writer, but a FAMOUS and BELOVED writer, winning everything from the Pulitzer to the Nobel. <br /><br />Sometimes I think this fantasizing actually gets in the way of a happy reality of just being a writer. I worry that people judge my stuff as not very good, or are disappointed by it, and I quit before I even try. <br /><br />This is not really a response to anything you wrote, it's just my own musings on the subject lately. I'm beginning to wonder if I'm letting daydreams get in the way of reality--by shortchanging myself, for one thing. <br /><br />/cool story broJessicanoreply@blogger.com