Revenge of the Finger-Guns

Body image as it relates to asexuality is something I've been meaning to write about for a while. It's something I'd be fascinated to see a study about, but I can't expect that to happen any time soon. As far as my own situation is concerned, I've noticed that in addition to an uncommon sexuality, I also have an uncommon body image. While I'm not exactly making finger-guns every morning in the mirror, I've realized that my body image is much more neutral than many of my peers' seem to be. In fact, I rarely think about my body at all, except when I'm pushing it's limits, such as trying to run more than a quarter-mile at one time. While I'm generally at peace with my body, I don't like to "flaunt it". I always enjoy compliments about what I'm wearing, but I'm uncomfortable exposing the body underneath. When most of my friends would wear heels and miniskirts to clubs, I would wear jeans and sneakers; who was I trying to attract, anyway? (Besides, when you're 5'4", everything's at least to your knees.) I don't care if people think I'm sexy or if they approve of my body. I've been told by many women that one reason why they seek sexual relationships is because it makes them "feel sexy" or "feel beautiful". But I've never understood what's so desirable about "feeling sexy" in the first place. I feel like I can look good whether anyone else notices or not.

And I wonder why this is. Sure, it could be because I'm asexual, and I'm not trying to reel people in with my abs of steel. But it could also be that body issues are just one of those randomly-distributed neurosis that I just happened not to get. Maybe it's because when that woman on television tells me about my "unsightly body fat", I am offended instead of in agreement. Maybe I've just accepted the fact that no matter how little I eat, I'll never have a "perfect" body, and learning to appreciate my given body is cheaper than liposuction. At a size 12, I'm a few inches past the ability to discuss your body problems in public; that's an opportunity usually reserved for the very thin. Since I've been the same size since I was in middle school, maybe I just got out of practice lamenting my body. So, there could be many reasons for my body positivity (or perhaps, indifference). However, a perusal of AVEN will show that there are many aces who aren't satisfied with the way they look. In many cases, it seems like people would like to look more androgynous, and I've heard women comment that they don't like their breasts. (If you're not planning on ever having biological kids, what's the point?) Or people would like to look plainer, so they don't attract sexual attention from people (would it be insensitive to wish I had this problem?). So I would theorize that while aces are by no means immune to body issues, ours tend to be different from what the mainstream might worry about.

If this wasn't enough body talk for you, Glad to Be A has written an interesting recent post on the topic...